Abstruse Musing

Within the last week, I've thought more about myself and the changes that have taken place. I guess one thing hasn't changed about me, I always need to be right. I still don't have a distinct path I want to undertake in my life. All I anticipate on in the near future is graduating and moving abroad for a few years. I'm enjoying going to work but I don't plan to stay there for long. I have to start thinking of ways to secure myself a job related to my field of studies. Enjoyed cheese naan and a selection of curry with friends. My little spoilt eight year old child, Noddy.

I'm currently at university and rather bored. I arrived on campus then realised class wasn't for another two hours. As I was ran past all the pedestrians with vacant expressions, I saw a van with an inspirational message. That van was the reason behind the title in this post, I pondered upon that expression and thought I would share it. I'm rather looking forward to the weekend, I'll be going to Jervis Bay with a group of friends. We'll be hiring a mini us and driving down there. I hope the weather will be nice, I'm ready to be a tourist and snap plenty of pictures. It's only Monday and I'm already pondering about the weekend. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels this way.

I was really happy to see my old lecturer from HR/IR strategy, Helen is teaching another subject I'm taking this semester. I aspire to be like her, she's so knowledgeable and I wish I could be like her some day. She told us to follow our dreams and to be prepared to change if the dream doesn't suit you any more. I wish I had heard that advice much sooner.  Last night I went to the Biennale exhibition at Walsh Bay, my companion and I arrived rather early. We were hoping to beat the queue since there was a free nail art event, it rained throughout the afternoon so the queue was almost non existent. I did manage to take a few pictures as the sun was setting, that made the wait a little more tolerable.   The exhibition was interesting and I wondered what it would've looked like in the daytime. It was a great experience, I intend to upload more pictures from last night after I've gone through them and edited a few. We sipped on cider and got our nails done. ...

I must get around to making pannacotta again! One of the few difficulties I've come to realise is that time is often very difficult to devise. As we age, we become increasingly aware of the responsibilities we have to bear and the consequences of our actions. And as a result, we must learn to maintain our obligations and social activities at equilibrium. I've found this to be a particularly difficult task to juggle and I'm still trying to find the status quo. I recall having this conversation many months ago with a friend from university, he too struggled to find the healthy balance between obligations and social activities. It wasn't until he brought the issue to light that I actually realised this problem existed. If you spend too much time fulfilling obligations, then you end up neglecting friends and vice versa.  At the present, my obligations have the utmost priority.  A friend asked me if I was free to catch up tomorrow, but I had to turn them down...

Usually at job interviews, I end up talking to other applicants. At my last interview, I became friends with one of the other interview attendees. We're live in the same suburb, share a friendship with the same childhood friend and we just really clicked. The interview was really competitive, I guess I'm not that surprised I didn't get the job. Even though I wasn't successful, the interview seminar was a good experience in itself. Not to mention it was the first time that I actually kept in contact with the someone I met at an interview. I was disappointed but I didn't feel that way for very long. I learned a lot about myself and I've made a new acquaintance. I certainly didn't feel this liberated from any previous interviews. Tonight I received an email from an employer from five years ago, T. She asked everyone to come hang out and have a drink for old time's sake. I never noticed how fast time has progressed, sometimes I need to be reminded that t...

As we age, we learn from our mistakes. An acquaintance said that taking chances equates to marginally lesser remorse in the long run. Albeit, at first I agreed with their simplistic views. Upon thinking about it further, I realised that such a notion would completely conflict with my personality. I don't feel comfortable taking a risk without properly and thoroughly thinking it through. I make calculated risks from observations and facts. Sometimes I wish I had the virtue of being simple minded. I've long since realised this could no longer be a reality for me. In some situations, I wished I could be stupid and do what I want. What we want may not always be righteous. The facade I built still exists today. I feel embarrassed about displaying emotions apart from happiness and anger. I can openly express these two opposite ends of the spectrum. What lies in between is still a constant struggle for me to exhibit. I'm dreading work with the weekend staff after my emotional ...

Honestly, I cringe whenever I hear that name or unit of temperature. My mind is plagued with things I should have said and things I should have left unsaid. But all these no longer matter to myself nor the intended. I still firmly believe that this is ultimately for the best. I'll convince myself entirely in due time. I won't have the luxury of time once the semester begins. I'm taking 5 subjects this semester so I really won't have time to ponder. I find it rather ridiculous that the world is more concerned with Justin Bieber's new hairstyle than the fact that an entire nation's freedom is being oppressed. It's disheartening to know that some people don't care that citizens of Libya are being killed for fighting for what they believe in. Will we become a generation of completely indifferent people? I hope that will not be so. I've moved around through different groups of friends throughout the years. Sometimes when you drift away from someone,...

Lately it seems as though my writing here as become restrained, I feel like I'm writing for a certain audience. I've concentrated on the more positive side of life but this doesn't feel genuine. Life isn't always rainbows and ponies, that's just the way it is. I'm writing about my thoughts and my life, it's only natural that there is a balance between the exuberant and sardonic. My cousin is returning from England to get married. I'd say many people are somewhat skeptical about this wedding in November. I daresay, even I myself, am somewhat taken aback by this decision. I suppose there is not much to be shocked about  , it was expected that Anna and Tommy would separate in the end. Life tends to take unexpected turns, sometimes these changes reap positive experiences. They're chosen to remain as friends. It would be a shame for them to have known each other more than a decade and lose everything. As a spectator, yes I was disappointed in Tommy...

If dreams were a reflection of our inner most desires, I would choose reality over fairy dreams. At least in reality, we have the power and capability to bring such desires to light. I've had my head up in the clouds for long enough, some things are best left in the past. When we dwell too long upon the ghosts of yesterday, we fail to see the bigger picture. In the last week or so, I've come to realize that I have indeed let go of bygones. I suppose 2011 is already off to a good start. Yesterday I received a phone call from a friend from university, she told me she's getting engaged. I was really excited, I could not contain myself. I'm really happy that she has found true virtue, I'm really looking forward to the engagement party this weekend. I'm not sure what this year will bring, but one thing is definite. Hello summer school, I'll have to learn to wake up early again. This sounds like a mission in itself already. I've been waking up at really o...

Today is another grey day. I can hear the wind howling and beckoning outside. I've finally reset my sleeping patterns back to normal, its amazing what a night of tequila and vodka can do. In the space of two months, I've gradually found the opportunity for self growth and learning. My perspective on a lot of people and issues have changed for the better. Maybe we do grow a little wiser as we grow older.   I'm going to enjoy the company of those I care for, I've given up on reaching out to certain people for the time being. I don't want to pursue dead ends right now, perhaps the anguish of time will repair what is perpetually broken. So keep your thoughts positive and surely good experiences will come your way. Happiness is contagious.Ticklish pedicures, chocolate binge, shopping for heels and singing out loud in the car are all things which make me smile. I can't say my bank account is necessarily smiling at me right now.   Next to the university cafe ...

I'm not exactly over it or indifferent, I have my good days and my bad days. This predicament seems contagious lately, I guess the curse of the tea party was true. I came to realize that Jess, Pri and I were having the same problem. Its ironic how we were so content talking about our significant other, things are quite the opposite now. I don't mind offering people advice even if I'm facing my own problems. You give and you receive. All I want is for you to be happy and I guess this ending will eventually lead you to that. I wish I could've sustained my hope, but the anguish of time is too hard to deal with. If I was stronger, I would've waited longer. I wanted to say more, but I felt like I talking to a brick wall. Maybe we'll talk when I learn to grow up or find some courage. The best option is one which leaves you with no regrets. It wasn't the best choice that I made, but I'll deal with the consequences. I know this will be easier to deal with w...