Abstruse Musing

Today the sky is blue, the wind whispers to the eucalyptus trees and there's not a sulfur crested cockatoo or Indian Mynah in near sight. I wish I wasn't home bound, I've been sick the last week. All I want to do is stay in bed, read a good book or listen to Lana Del Rey's alluring voice. But I have to write my essay, I've got to keep motivated and focused for just a little bit longer. I'm not really one to organize anything, I have in the past but I see it as somewhat of a chore. I was too lazy to organize anything for my birthday so I just hung out with certain people and made half assured promises to plan something. And it just so turns out that my two best friends, Tim & Priya, planned a surprise party for me. I've been craving for cheese naan and beef vindaloo for quite some time, so this was just perfect. There are times when I find myself reminiscing the times we spent in the laboratory together and those long lunches together. I miss ...

Suze reminded me of some cheesy line I wrote in a script we wrote in high school... "All things come to an end." It certainly rings some truth.

I've been meaning to post about a dinner I had a while ago with Amy and Chuyen. We got together to catch up one night, Amy made some pho. I met Lilly there, she was quite a character. She had a lot of strong opinions and she strikes me as wise person. We had a few glasses of wine and just started talking about life. I suppose it was rather empowering to hear about Amy, Chuyen and Lilly's life experiences. It certainly sparked a lot of deep pondering for me. I suppose what I'd like in life is stability, that is something I haven't had a lot of in my life. I really need to think about what I want. The problem is no one really asked what I wanted when I was growing up, that is possibly why I don't have a concrete answer in mind. I'm thinking of deferring and try to figure things out. Sometimes I'm not so understanding, especially when I'm clouded with so much doubt. I only have so much patience. Still wondering if I should call H, but I better not put ...

We went out to have dinner with the group on Saturday for Fok's birthday. It was nice to see most of the group there, of course its quite pleasant to have Amy and Chuyen back with us. Seems we've all missed out on a lot of things with them gone during high school days. As usual we were all obnoxiously loud but I really don't care what people think. I guess its been a while since I laughed until my stomach ached. I'd rather not think about complicated things right now.

I was on facebook and Sara's status just made me laugh so much. Exams and studying has sapped the life out of me, but I sure got a good chuckle out of this. I'll never be able to keep a straight face if I hear this song playing...

So we had dinner with my cousin from England, Anna. I used to be afraid of her, I guess with her being an elder it was normal to be afraid. I remember she used to paint in her bedroom and how she forced me and William watch Oprah with her. At the tender age of 8, I didn't care for the issues discussed on Oprah. Today if I was watching Oprah, you probably can't tear me away from the television. It was nice to see her again last night, I finally got to speak to her normally. Isn't it funny how people change as they age? I've learned to fear no one, I'll even stand up to my dad when he is being unreasonable (this involves gradual escalation of your voice). However, I did notice one thing. Her face was calm, but her fists were screwed up into knots when Tommy spoke without thinking again (nothing new). I suppose this was her facade, pretending nothing happened even though he was unfaithful to her. They're engaged. I always pictured perfection in Anna and Tommy. ...

Yes, this is Shirley . I had the pleasure of meeting her tonight. A giant spider on my head rest, it was a nice little meeting which I screamed to. I knew something was up when I got in the car... Tim and Dani were giggling an awful lot, though I didn't discover Shirley's presence until they told me. Rest assured, I still screamed. So we headed to our usual hang out, Mars Hill. I missed that place, its been a while since we stepped in there together. I still love the aroma of coffee, the aesthetics of the paintings (sometimes they have weird paintings hung on the wall), and the feeling of being at home. I guess it was an ideal spot for Earth Hour, they even lit up candles throughout the cafe. Something about the painting of the astronaut captured my attention the whole time. I couldn't stop staring at it. I suppose we're all a little obsessed with discovering what lies beyond this earth. Perhaps thats why we have space shuttles. I used to think there wer...

I finally got to visit Chuyen on Saturday. Her daughter, Raelyn, is a mere 10 days old. She looks so fragile and so adorable! Amy drove me to Chuyen's place, it was nice to see her again. I missed seeing the two of them, it would be nice if we could get our entire high school group together again. I wish I could've contacted H, I know H wanted to go see Chuyen & Raelyn... Even Chuyen wanted to see H again. Well I took plenty of pictures to show H seeing as babies have a tendency to grow up too quickly. It was Helen's 21st yesterday, it was good to see some of the high school crew again. Even though it was a sea themed party, not many people actually dressed up (with the exception of roughly 3 people). I was planning on coming as Ursula then decided not to do it since I couldn't do my hair up like her. Surprisingly Sara said she was thinking about coming as Ursula as well, great minds think alike perhaps. I have to give credit to Helen's sign on the left....

Met up with H today, it was a rather spontaneous meeting... H called to ask about certain plans I had texted about a few days ago and we diverted to the topic of caffeine. Out of the blue I just asked if H would want to catch up over coffee right now... We went to a cafe and I think I almost fainted once I saw the menu. Poffertjes ! I think the fainting bit applied to the both of us, pity we had to rush to get to the cinema shortly. So we opted for coffee only. Well fudge, I'm pretty behind with my studies. Maybe I should study til my brain explodes just for the sake of catching up. Simply put it this way, I'm easily distracted and an occasional daydreamer. Okaynow for some good news! Chuyen gave birth to her daughter a few days ago. Raelynn sounds like a very beautiful name. I must go visit her very soon and get some sort of a present for Raelynn. Sometimes I regret the things I say, other times I simply regret the things I don't say. I'm sorry for ignoring you tim...

The holiday seems to have gone by quite rapidly. I know this because I'm going back to classes tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow. And quite frankly I'm dreading every single bit of it. I haven't really written anything at all this holiday, so I should imagine my writing would resemble scribbles. I've discovered an interesting paraody of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice. Don't get me wrong, I tried to read the original thing, but it wasn't my cup of tea. The book seemed a lot more interesting when zombies were added to the equation. I did mention that I like all things familiar. I loved Polly Pocket back when I was a kid. My cousin loved them too (and Sailor Moon), and he was a boy. H and I went to Beca's place and I think I started squealing like a high school girl when I saw her collection of Polly Pockets. You'll never guess who else has a liking for Polly Pocket... It seems even boys (other than my cousin) like them. In fact, I think Beca's nephe...

Well I printed out my UAC papers and I guess I'll pay for it next week sometime. I feel genuinely lost. I thought I was alone on this one, but I guess Helen was a tad lost herself too. I guess we'll all settle these things soon... Okay so we all went to MSL's house yesterday to sort of model for her assignment. By modelling I mean we had to pretend to sing and look like we were having a great time. Needless to say, we were not very good with pretending to be happy. It was sort of bizarre to have a camera pointed in your direction without the need to stifle a few chuckles here and there. Well we had to play a little game she made for her project. The game consisted of questions to pin point whether a person's lifestyle was sustainable or not. The funny part was the unsustainable people (Fok & Tony) had to sing a song we call 'eat it' , which was a hilarious MJ knock off. It was pretty fun, posing for snaps and repeating a few lines here and there. I...

Today I ran into an old friend, a rather wise friend actually. I can't recall the last time I had such an in depth and meaningful conversation much like this one. The funny thing was, in the past this friend and I just spoke of aspirations of the future. Two years had past since those talks and I guess we have found something else in common. This friend, K, has a profound love of literature (poetry in fact). Something K said today sparked much thinking... Writing can be the one thing that allows you to transcend the boundaries of common understanding. In my mind, the theory of relativity is just that everything is relative to what you perceive. And you're quite right K... Words are nothing but letters put together to better understand each other better. I wonder when I'll be as wise and articulate as you. Somewhere along the road, you discovered your true aspirations of the future and you're living that dream now. I guess I had better catch up to you soon.

Sylvie left this morning. It seems strange knowing that I won't get to see her smiling face until April, thats if she does come back permanently. I didn't want to cry in front of her, so I left her a letter in her going away present. I recall myself writing that letter two nights ago at 3am and getting all teary eyed. I'll miss Sylvie. She is still the same genuine and sincere person I met back in 3rd grade. I've realised that I can't take Friend A any more. Friend B told me she won't be coming into class today because she is too angry to face Friend A. I deliberated not coming in as well, but I contended I should give her one last chance. I would survive that excruciating 3 hours with her in the pract. I wished Friend B was there, she is the buffer zone that keeps the balance within this so-called group. I didn't speak to Friend A in class, I just carried on collected all the required apparatus, put dye in the DNA assays and centrifuged them. The demon...

Today was another splendid day with Sara, Sylvie, Jenny and Ajla. A literally sweet day which consisted of coffee, pancakes, snapshots & memories. Seeing as Sylvie has not been in contact with asian culture for the past 6 years in America... We decided to go to the chinese gardens to dress up and pose for pictures. Totally embarassing, I know. But it was heaps of fun being with the girls. Plenty of giggles to go around. It was disappointing that the day seemed to end so soon. Much like the days remaining til Sylvie goes back home to Washington. She seemed quite amazed by the beauty of Circular Quay (yes Sara, key). All these years I've lived here I never really noticed the serenity of the quay. It was always bustling with tourists taking pictures or tourists asking you to take their picture. But when the sun begins to set, it truly is a magnificent view. I used to take that for granted, but today it was captivating. I wish everyday was like today.

I'm sitting here listening to the rain outside softly fall. I wonder when the rain within will fall. I'll start this entry on a much less delightful note. I don't care what you have to say for yourself because I've already had enough. Just because I previously said nothing, it doesn't necessarily mean that I " don't mind " . Do you stand by and allow a person to provoke a friend for absolutely no reason? You tried to stop him? I highly doubt bringing attention to the fact that I'm around helps because that is the sole catalyst which fuels those harsh words from your friend. I've chased after enough lost causes in my lifetime, I'm not about to add another to the list. Jenny, Sara, Sylvie and I met up for dinner today. I missed seeing the girls and it reminded me so much of high school. It seemed as though Sylvie wasn't gone for the past 6 years. Sure she came back with an american accent, but she still seems like the same great perso...

Oh my god. I totally forgot Sylvie was coming back tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow! Wait, I mean today! I haven't seen her in a few good years, I wonder if she's changed very much. She went off to America to study and she's coming back for a visit. I'm really excited! Ajla texted me asking if I was going to the airport with her. I had no idea I was "going"... I should do my assignment all day tomorrow, but what the heck. Why would I miss such a golden opportunity to catch up? I'm really ecstatic about it, I wonder if I'd be able to sleep at all later... Okay, on a much less lighter note. Mumbler. I didn't want to talk about the mumbler lately, but here goes. So mumbler's ex girlfriend spoke to me a few days ago. I'd rather not delve into the details. But she certainly got me thinking. Negative thoughts concerning a certain someone, yes. Maybe it is time to stop having anything to do with you at all. I can only take so many disappointments. Each ti...

I probably should be asleep in bed right now, but I thought I'd ramble on about things before I sleep. First of all, I'm really okay now. I'm not planning to be vindictive and seek revenge on that idiot. It was probably my fault for yelling back at him. But anyway, its already happened. It was just one of those days. So on Saturday we had our primary school reunion (stole a picture my sister took). It was nice to see the school once again, even though it is merely a 5 minute walk from my house. I went with Amy and Pisan to the school. I was pretty surprised my 2nd grade teacher still recognised me and Pisan. There was a mini museum set up in one of the classrooms and it was nice to see the 125 years of history all put into one room for display. I saw many of the elderly there, and its quite touching to see that they've made the effort to come. Cindy said she saw an elderly woman in a wheel chair at the school. She noted that this woman was all enthusiastic about being...

I just got home a while ago from catching up with Amy, Chuyen and MSL. I don't think I've enjoyed dinner quite as much as this particular occassion. Theres something about cooking a meal with friends which seems to make food taste a whole lot better. We opted for a quiet night in.. This quiet night consisted of cooking, eating, laughing, reminising, and more eating for 3 hours. I wonder how I will sleep with all this food to somehow digest. I think if I was a goldfish, I would've gone "belly up" a long time ago... It was pleasant to see Amy and Chuyen's children. I simply adore those young beaming faces, they are so full of life and innocence. Oh, I was so touched when Amy's daughter came up to me and offered me a cream puff. I think I almost melted (I must apologise Amy, I can't spell her name). I'm so sleepy but I think I better do something for an hour or so, this food needs some time to digest. My eyelids are already getting heavy... So whi...

The whole day at uni today felt somewhat unfamiliar today. Biochem pract didn't go too well... The 3 hour pract was mainly spent uttering words of profanity whilst I fussed over my results. Last night I stayed up late to prepare for the management tutorial, hoping to win the attention of the lecturer, Helen. Helen always found it to be strange that I was doing a third year management subject, and I was keen to prove myself to her. I've answered questions she asked in the last few lectures, it seems people were not too responsive in lectures. Today she noticed me, and I wish she didn't notice me. She made me team leader and had to direct discussions within my group of 7. I felt that was stepping out of my comfort zone, and I could not perform quite so well as team leader. I guess in the lab, most work is done independantly or with a partner. It was very seldom that we worked in a group with more than 3 members. Sure the experience overwhelmed me, but it was a good experienc...