Abstruse Musing

Each step I take is another calculated risk, I suppose thats how I figure out if what I'm doing is 'right'. I wish I didn't have to scrutinize every single small detail down to the smallest grain. I just end up with an impending headache at the end of each day. I'm going to miss having my mom around. But we all have to do what is right, and this feels just about right. Its likely that I will lose parts of my sanity from now til the end of April. Well not really, though I imagine I would be very stressed and spending more time sleeping than blogging. Today marks the start of a rather stressing month...

Yes, this is Shirley . I had the pleasure of meeting her tonight. A giant spider on my head rest, it was a nice little meeting which I screamed to. I knew something was up when I got in the car... Tim and Dani were giggling an awful lot, though I didn't discover Shirley's presence until they told me. Rest assured, I still screamed. So we headed to our usual hang out, Mars Hill. I missed that place, its been a while since we stepped in there together. I still love the aroma of coffee, the aesthetics of the paintings (sometimes they have weird paintings hung on the wall), and the feeling of being at home. I guess it was an ideal spot for Earth Hour, they even lit up candles throughout the cafe. Something about the painting of the astronaut captured my attention the whole time. I couldn't stop staring at it. I suppose we're all a little obsessed with discovering what lies beyond this earth. Perhaps thats why we have space shuttles. I used to think there were aliens

So my mom's flying to Vietnam this Monday, despite the fact that the funeral was yesterday. But I do think its a good idea that she goes back to her roots for a while. Well a month really. I'm fine with cooking for my sister and I, but my dad eats like he ever seen food in his life. So thats what gets me a bit worried. Cindy and I decided to go to the rocks for the markets, seeing as today is officially the last one for a while. I know I'm not supposed to take pictures at MCA but what the heck. I just have to take at least one photo from one visit. I love the painting above, its the same painting but from different perspectives. The first one is of the painting when viewed from the left side, and the second one is of the same painting when viewed from the right. I guess that really says something about perspective. I happened to run into these lovely ladies at the rocks market this afternoon. Aren't they stunning? I'm sure they have a great sense of characte

Another crap day today, I hate Tuesdays. In fact, I hate weekdays in general. Molecular biology pract was a disaster, DNA bands didn't show up after DNA electrophoresis. Organic chemistry tutorial wasn't too bad, I semi enjoyed it. Mom seems a little better today, well she had made plans to get her passport renewed and try make it to the funeral (which is within the coming of days). Except one small problem, she can't make it in 2 days. So it is suffice to say that she will not be able to see her own mother's face one last time. I feel bad about that because if I was in her position, I'd probably live the rest of my life in much remorse. She asked me if she should even go back, considering she won't make it to the funeral... Cindy and I suggested she should go to pay her last respect to her mother. Sure she is getting cremated, but it doesn't mean she can't go. I don't know if what I'm typing makes much sense right now, afterall I am rather

What sort of emotions should be registered when you hear a family member has passed away? I suppose the natural reaction would be sorrow. Yet I don't really feel that way, all I can register is ambiguity and the disappointment that I'd never be able to meet my grandmother.. Today my grandmother in Vietnam died, my estranged aunt in America told me over the phone. The first thought was my mother, who hasn't seen her own mother for two decades... I didn't know how I was supposed to break her heart by telling her that. The only sorrow I feel is from knowing that my mother will be in heart wrenching pain.

I finally got to visit Chuyen on Saturday. Her daughter, Raelyn, is a mere 10 days old. She looks so fragile and so adorable! Amy drove me to Chuyen's place, it was nice to see her again. I missed seeing the two of them, it would be nice if we could get our entire high school group together again. I wish I could've contacted H, I know H wanted to go see Chuyen & Raelyn... Even Chuyen wanted to see H again. Well I took plenty of pictures to show H seeing as babies have a tendency to grow up too quickly. It was Helen's 21st yesterday, it was good to see some of the high school crew again. Even though it was a sea themed party, not many people actually dressed up (with the exception of roughly 3 people). I was planning on coming as Ursula then decided not to do it since I couldn't do my hair up like her. Surprisingly Sara said she was thinking about coming as Ursula as well, great minds think alike perhaps. I have to give credit to Helen's sign on the left.

Its been a pretty shit day and I think my lack of sleep isn't helping. I think I want to strangle someone, namely my lecturer. He went off at me because I apparently left the lecture early last week to see the dentist. I'm sure thats great, but rewind... I didn't go to the dentist last week and I stayed for the entire lecture. Of course, being the egotistic jerk that he is he refused to listen. I was in a pretty crappy mood already, so yeah the waterworks just switched on and I left the class for an hour. Turns out a few friends vouched for me and he decided to apologise. He claims he was in a bad mood . Well thats nice to know, really. I think I've lost all respect for this man. But I don't care any more, I'll just do what I have to do and just hold my breath. Somehow I'm supposed to prepare for 2 practs which I have today, but I feel so sluggish after a nap. I'm completely disoriented and my eyes feel so dry. I just want to go back to sleep, I coul

Met up with H today, it was a rather spontaneous meeting... H called to ask about certain plans I had texted about a few days ago and we diverted to the topic of caffeine. Out of the blue I just asked if H would want to catch up over coffee right now... We went to a cafe and I think I almost fainted once I saw the menu. Poffertjes ! I think the fainting bit applied to the both of us, pity we had to rush to get to the cinema shortly. So we opted for coffee only. Well fudge, I'm pretty behind with my studies. Maybe I should study til my brain explodes just for the sake of catching up. Simply put it this way, I'm easily distracted and an occasional daydreamer. Okaynow for some good news! Chuyen gave birth to her daughter a few days ago. Raelynn sounds like a very beautiful name. I must go visit her very soon and get some sort of a present for Raelynn. Sometimes I regret the things I say, other times I simply regret the things I don't say. I'm sorry for ignoring you tim

I need to really learn to sleep early. Sleeping 3 hours then waking up to go to class is not the most ideal thing to do... Yet I still do that sometimes. So went to the markets down at The Rocks with Pisan today. It was quite nice and probably was the best thing about this week. I wish I could've been the usual asian tourist and snapped pictures frantically at everything in sight. Pity I forgot my camera. Good food, good company and a bit of jazz music. That is all I need as a good ending note to the notorious weekdays. I really have a problem with commitment. Especially with the bonsai craze a while ago. I'd start something then become so indifferent and bored with it. Maybe I really can't take that leap of faith (you know who you are). I can't do something I don't believe in whole heartedly. I have to calculate every single thing I do or decide on, this just doesn't fit the equation. I can't run the risk. I'll just keep giving up at regular interva

Today started out with what seemed like a terrible day. You know the signs... The grey sky, the rain, and running absolutely late. I do have to admit immunology sort of intimidated me, it seems the level of standards have taken another step forward. I'm absolutely ridiculous when it comes to keeping a proper laboratory book. I've always found myself in trouble from the lecturer for scribbling down calculations or results on scrap pieces of paper. Oh yes, I saw Kate at the molecular biology lecture. She seems fine now, I think Peter is finally out of her system. We were discussing reproduction parasitism and how some female insects kill their mate. Kate just responded with " about time ". I didn't know if I was supposed to laugh or agree with her. This is what happens when Priya and I get bored in a lecture...  The rest of the evening involved feasting on some comfort food. I do love a good risotto when gloomy weather looms ahead. Good food, good company, bu