Abstruse Musing

I was told I needed surgery in a few days, it was a surprise to me. The anaesthetist saw me and commented, " I wasn't expecting someone so young ." I was upset by the time I got to the operating theatre, I was administered more relaxant whilst everyone present reassured me that I would be fine. I was sedated and aware of my surroundings, I heard the doctors commenting but I couldn't see what was happening (thankfully). It felt alien - I was an observer, a passenger and not quite present in the moment. Thanks to the experience of the operating team and advancements in modern medicine, I'm on the steady road to recovery. The last three weeks of my life seemed like a dream, still not quite present in the moment. I've reflected on my life, relationships, career and my hopes for the future. I still want to achieve more. The notion of happiness will always be a constant struggle of achieving some semblance of status quo. Happiness is an equilibrium, fleeting and

Tonight I found myself pondering about the pieces of myself from the past. That one thought has led me back here, a very personal outlet that I haven't frequented since 2012. The world as I know it now is vastly different from my last entry from almost 4.5 years ago. I wonder if my thoughts from all these years is still being read by someone or if someone related to my feelings at the time. Fast forward 4.5 years later and I am immersed in the corporate world. I've experienced change, found my other half, aggressively pursued my career goals and learned the hard way that work-life balance is important. To me, this blog holds a special place because everything I have experienced from the first entry has made me more resilient.