Abstruse Musing

I find myself at peace when the days are grey and when silence permeates throughout the quiet hours of the day. There is emptiness yet something peaceful about these moments of solitude. There is the symphony of the wind whistling throughout the leaves, the sound of a distant choir and the smell of a warm comforting meal wafting through the window. I feel so much at ease just thinking about these things, just the simple impression of a myriad of things. All these thoughts and feelings come alive at night. Lurking beneath the glowing street lamps, the cold stars, the empty canvas in my room. It's all there, the thoughts I've tried to hard to conceal. He is the memory that comes alive in my dreams and I wish it wasn't this way. I used to hate the night because I couldn't sleep. I learned to love the night because there was you. I am torn between these sentiments and reality. I no longer have the courage to pick up your calls. I never realised how important closure w

Truthfully, I've still yet to sustain my hope. Seeing an old friend reminded me of the calmer and more welcoming days of my youth. Those were the days when our eyes were filled with ambition, we thought we'd cure cancer or do something great to better society. We were naive, innocent and dreamers. I find myself in a more secure state of mind when I ponder back upon these once blissful and carefree days. But alas, paths diverge and memories fade. I met up with D this week for a brief lunch. It was reassuring to see a familiar face which belonged to these ill forgotten times. I used to be intimidated by D, she had a very solid exterior and I was timid. But upon closer inspection, you find that there is more than meets the eye. Yes, she was both strong minded and willed. As time progressed, I saw a person who sought to be understood entirely and not just be perceived as some sort of tempest. It was a pleasant yet brief lunch, I was glad I invited D to lunch. Sometimes I feel

I used to write here when I couldn't sleep or when something was bothering me. I'd like to think that has changed, so I haven't frequented here as often as I once did. Indeed the past shapes who we ultimately become tomorrow. But it does not do well to dwell on the past, particularly if you are reminded of not so pleasant times. Whilst these unpleasant times are essential to self growth and enrichment, I find myself slowly and surely forgetting. Planetarium reminds me of the past and the people which once inhabited in my memories. There are friends and alike who have gradually drifted away as time progressed. While I understand this is a natural part of growing up, sometimes I wonder if I should've done anything to prevent it. One day you realise something has gone amiss, but it is already too late to salvage what no longer exists. We constantly search, meeting disappointment along the way, then realise it can no longer be a part of you any more. I first heard pla